Googling “how to tie knots”.

Trying to avoid the filter,

that sends you to the prevention line

Pace my apartment.

No place to rig the sheet.

I’m not tall but

the ceilings are low.

And how the place creaks.

Pipes that strain against their purpose.

It might just come down with me.

Another mess.

I weigh the accumulated shit.

Statues and games.

Books upon books I never read.

Concoct a scheme.

Where if they were piled.

At the head of the bed.

And drop off the foot.

Maybe there would be enough weight

to sustain me.

Think about running away.

About not having a car.

Start to do the math,

for all the bills and debts

I could pay off.

All that I couldn’t.

Let the tears come for a while.